


Not Being Mine

by HarperJean



Category: Hanson (Band), Taylor Swift (Musician)
Genre: F/M, Musicians, Song fic, Tour, crack ship, songwriters, speak now era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-05
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2019-01-30 00:51:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12642783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarperJean/pseuds/HarperJean
Summary: You're so gorgeous it actually hurts...(A request based off of lyrics from "Gorgeous" by Taylor Swift!)





	Not Being Mine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sparkinside (boomersoonerash)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/boomersoonerash/gifts).



_Ocean blue eyes lookin’ in mine_  
_I feel like I might_  
_Sink and drown and die…_

***

#### 2007 

_“You know that you’ve been on my mind…Georgia…” Taylor sang full voice from the passenger seat, her dad driving along happily and chuckling at his excitable daughter. Her whole body had been buzzing since she got the new CD in her hands, after convincing her dad to drive her to Target before the sun was up._

_“You’re crazy, Tay.”_

_“I know, but I need it before school. I’ll go insane if I don’t hear the new songs.”_

_Now she was on her way to a gig, wondering if anyone would notice if she slipped a thrown together cover of Georgia into her own setlist. She let her forehead fall onto the cool glass of the passenger seat window and closed her eyes, letting Taylor Hanson’s voice wash over her. She sighed heavily, a smile creeping up to her lips._

_When she was only twelve, he had gotten married, and her silly middle school dreams were dashed. She was convinced she would be the one to marry him someday. Sure, every girl said that, but she had the fierce tenacity to actually somehow pull it off. She was younger than him, sure, but love always found a way. She firmly believed that. She believed it so much that she got in trouble more often than not._

_“Tay?” Her dad poked her shoulder, ripping her out of her daydream. “We’re here, sweetie.”_

_Taylor looked through the window and saw the venue, the lights on the marquis making happy butterflies zoom around her stomach. She shook her curls out and attempted to banish any thought of the blue eyed boy from Oklahoma. That night she played every song for him, wherever he was._

***

#### September 2011 

“30 minutes, Taylor.”

She barely looked up from her journal. She was ready to go, her hair had been curled and she was already in costume. Sound check had gone well, and she was sure the dancers were somewhere warming up, right on schedule. She was so involved in every aspect of this tour, and while that was something she took pride in, there were moments that she wished she could turn a blind eye. Mostly to the VIP guest list. 

“Isaac Hanson, one guest  
Taylor Hanson  
Zac Hanson, one guest” 

She took a deep breath and fiddled with the sharpie she was holding. She needed to write lyrics on her arms, but nothing was coming to mind. Instead, she outlined the bold “13” on her hand yet again, hoping that something would strike her. She opened up her laptop, chewing her nails mindlessly. Would it be ridiculous to cover herself in Hanson lyrics? 

Her hands were shaking as she scrolled through her iTunes, her mind going a mile a minute. 

“This is ridiculous. You don’t even know him,” she muttered to herself.

***

#### 2007

_“Abbi!” Taylor called from her locker when she saw her best friend walk towards her. “You have to listen to this album I got.”_

_“Hanson?” Abigail asked, tossing her curls over her shoulder._

_“How did you know?”_

_“Tay, it’s all you’ve been talking about for days.”_

_Taylor let out a sheepish giggle and dug her headphones out of her backpack. “Well, it’s amazing, and you need to listen to it.”_

_“I’m not listening to it right now, weirdo. I’ll come over after school and you can force it down my throat then.”_

_“Fine.”_

_“Does your husband sound amazing on it?”_

_“Of course, when does he not? He’s perfect, Ab.”_

_“You’re ridiculous.”_

_“I’m fully aware of that. Someday though...someday.”_

_“Someday what?!”_

_“Someday I’ll meet him and...I don’t know. Maybe we’ll do a song together or something.”_

_“And he’ll fall madly in love with you?”_

_“I didn’t say that!!”_

_“But you meant it,” Abigail nudged Taylor and nodded towards her classroom. “I’ll see you after class. Then it’s Hanson time!”_

***

#### September 2011

“Please don’t be in love with someone else  
Please don’t have somebody waiting on you…  
This night is sparkling, don’t you let it go  
I’m wonderstruck, blushing all the way home,  
I’ll spend forever wondering if you knew….”

Taylor closed her eyes and let the music whisk her away. She could feel the words on her arms tingling, as though she had been branded instead of just written on with a sharpie. She had finally settled on The Flaming Lips for her arm lyrics. 

_“Do you realize that you have the most beautiful face?”_

She knew it was silly, and she couldn’t stop berating herself for her stupid teenage crush that was rearing its ugly head. She was the star, here. Taylor Hanson was here to see _her_ , not the other way around. She was in control. She let the final notes of Enchanted linger, letting the roar of the crowd wash over her before launching into to Haunted. She kept her eyes up towards the nosebleed seats all night, not wanting to let her gaze fall on a pair of blue eyes that would make her stomach start doing backflips. She just had to get through the show and then…

Well she wasn’t sure what would happen then. Would they want to come backstage and meet her? Taylor didn’t have a guest with him. There was a party tonight she was supposed to attend. She was glad that at this point on tour, she could let herself go on autopilot so her mind could wander. Or reel, apparently. 

After Long Live, she scurried backstage and changed for the encore. For the first time that night, she felt relieved. Fifteen and Love Story. Those were two songs she could do, and for some reason they felt like they fit the night perfectly, even though she ended every show with them. For one thing, she felt like she was fifteen, her entire body shaking with nerves because her first celebrity crush was in the audience. As for Love Story, she knew she had to hit the last song out of the park, and she knew she always brought the house down with her retelling of Romeo and Juliet. She wasn’t sure why, but she felt like something was taking over inside of her. Some sort of determination that she felt when she was in the studio, or in meetings with her record label.

***

####  2008 

_“So dim that spotlight, tell me things like I can’t take my eyes off of you_  
 _I’m no one special just another wide eyed girl_  
 _Who’s desperately in love with you…”_

 _Taylor’s brow crinkled with concentration as she wrote down the short bursts of lyrics that came into her mind. She was working diligently every day on songs for her new record, and she wanted to impress with every single word she wrote._

_“Tay, do you want to take a break?” Her mom knocked softly on the door, entering cautiously. She was used to her daughter sequestering herself for hours at a time in order to finish a song._

_“I’m right on the verge with this one Mom. I’ll come down when I’m done.”_

_“Can I hear what you have so far?”_

_Taylor sighed, but nodded. She beckoned her mom in and started from the top. As she began to play she said softly, “This one isn’t about anyone I actually know…”_

***

#### September 2011 

“Hey, I’m Taylor.”

Taylor laughed nervously, seeing the man before her that she had been so anxious and nervous to meet all night. “Me too,” she said, wincing at her sorry attempt at humor. 

“Great show tonight. Really, it was awesome.” 

“Thanks. I...it was a great crowd.” 

“Have you met my brothers?” 

“No!” Taylor said, too loudly, excited for a distraction from the piercing blue eyes in her line of vision. She hugged Zac and Isaac, blabbering about how Middle of Nowhere was the first CD she ever owned and how meeting them was a dream come true. She was sure her face was bright red at this point, and was thankful that the lighting at the party was so dim. Hopefully no one would see her obvious embarrassment, or fault her for talking loudly over the thumping music. 

“It was so great to meet you, Taylor,” Isaac said politely, signalling that it was his cue to leave. “I’ve gotta get home, but...hey, maybe we can collaborate sometime.” 

“I would love that so much,” Taylor responded breathlessly, every middle school version of herself screaming with glee from the past. 

“I’m gonna head out too,” Zac added. “I’m not...much of a party guy. But seriously, thanks for a great show. I hope you can come to one of ours some day.” 

“Me too.” 

She stood there for a moment, wondering if Taylor would take his leave next, but he stayed still, sipping his drink quietly. 

“Do you have to get going?” She asked timidly. 

“Nope. My wife is gone for the week. Living that bachelor lifestyle.” 

“Where is she?” 

“In Georgia, visiting her family.” 

“Oh.” Taylor looked around nervously, wondering how long she could get away with talking to him before making the rounds and schmoozing with everyone else in the room. Suddenly, she felt a wave of the unwarranted determination from earlier flare up yet again. “So from one songwriter to another...is Georgia about your wife?” 

“Wow!” He barked with laughter and took another sip of his drink. “Just going for it, aren’t you.” 

She shrugged, a smile dancing on her lips. “Just curious.” 

“Okay...fine. Yes. It is.” 

“That’s my favorite Hanson song.” 

“Really?” 

“Really.” 

“Okay...from one songwriter to another. Is Dear John about John Mayer?” 

It was her turn to yelp with laughter. “I put his name in it, I don’t think you really have to ask about that one.” Both of their grins grew wider. “Why, is that your favorite Taylor Swift song?” 

“No. That would be Superstar.” 

She felt her face blanch, and hoped that the dim lighting was still helping her mask her feelings. She felt his hand brush hers as he placed his drink down on the high top nearest them. She was sure that his eyes were sparkling with some kind of knowledge. _There’s no way he knows_ , she thought to herself. _There’s no way he knows that’s about him._

“I don’t hear that one very often,” she responded, recovering as gracefully as she could. He shrugged and smiled, making her go weak in the knees. 

_Please don’t be in love with someone else,_ she thought, stupidly.


End file.
